I got a job at my uncles new restaurant in times square!!!
what really pisses me off is that without that F i would have been past a 2.0 and i would have been fine.
so yesterday, i slipped back into my depression once i found out my grades. i literally did not get out of bed and i slept all day. my mom came down stairs this morning and i was laying in bed and she told me that i needed to find a job and be a part of society and i was like “what’s the point of being a part of society?” she looked at me and said “i’m not having a repeat of last summer. i’m not dealing with this again.” so i said i know and she asked me if i heard anything about school and i looked at her and i was scared and said “yea i did. i failed organic chemistry.” she got really sad and i thought she was gonna yell at me and she said that she knew i was going to fail that class. i looked at her and said “yeah well i thought that my labs and my quizzes would help and the fact that i went to him for help.” and while i said that i started to tear up. she sat down on my bed and the minute she did i started sobbing in her arms and she sat there holding me and comforting me as i sobbed. she knows i tried in that class and she wants me to be there but she’s saying maybe it’s best if i come home, but i dont want to come home. idk but now that i got that out of the way, i feel better. i got out bed, washed my dogs, took a shower, now i’m gonna go pick up and smoke so i can feel A LOT better.
Baby girl doesn’t like bath time (Taken with instagram)
Why did I just start getting these flashbacks of her? Every moment spent with her literally every moment is playing like a movie in my head from start to finish. It made me stop what I was doing. Ugh it needs to stop…
I hate to say this but I need someone to save me. I really do. I can’t keep living like this.
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